Rise of the Guardians: Mythical Creatures Just Got Bad-ass

A kid's movie? Me? I know. Shocking.

So with all of the special effects, violence, and testosterone-filled flicks these days, it's no wonder when sometimes kids movies get a little beefed up. In the case of Rise of the Guardians (which I keep getting mixed up with Legends of the Guardians, which is a very different movie...) the formula actually works pretty well. While many have tried before to make Santa Claus a little less jolly and a bit more deep, there are innumerable times when this representation of the jolly gift-giver seriously and atrociously fails. However in this movie, I was impressed to find how likable the characters remain, and how many mythical beings get a little more limelight.

It's The Avengers for kids!

The story revolves around Jack Frost, who, in a nut shell, can make things really cold. Giving little kids Snow Days and causing minor mayhem is his favorite, and he loves to help little kids have fun on their days off from school. The only problem with Jack, though, is that no child can see him. In an interestingly accurate presentation, kids do not acknowledge Jack Frost because they have never heard of him. And in the world of the film, if a child does not believe in a mythical creature, they can't see them. Which is where the conflict in the film comes in.

If you can't see this picture, then you don't believe in Jack Frost.

Pitch Black, also referred to as just "Pitch" (which had me chortling in my seat cuz it sounded like they were saying somethin' else...), is the mythical creature known as the boogie man. Being a little uncomfortably scary, even for me, he has been unseen by children for decades. The dude gets fed up with being invisible and starts a war with the mythical creatures so that they will feel his pain. His mayhem stirs up many problems in the mythical creatures' worlds, and without the unfailing faith of children, their extinction knocks at the door. DUN DUN DUUUNNNN.

He's like Saruman for kids!

The mythical creatures in this flick include Santa Claus (voiced by Alec Baldwin), a robust, tattooed man with a strong Russian accent; the Easter Bunny (voiced by Hugh Jackman), a spry guy with an Australian accent and a boomerang; the Tooth Fairy (voiced by Isla Fisher), a class-A spaz that looks to be half hummingbird; the Sandman, adorably short and mute, who uses his golden dust to communicate with his buds; and Jack Frost (voiced by Chris Pine), who always looks freezing (d'oh ho ho...no but seriously, he made me cold). All of these creatures have such strong and separate personalities, the film ends up working quite well. Even though they all seem to be a little more human than most illustrations have depicted them in the past, this works for the film. Instead of softy things, they really pack a punch, and are not going down without a fight. And, quite, honestly, their reality makes them even funnier.

Hehe

Of course the cutest thing, as with all movies involving holiday icons, is the purity of the belief of children that these things exist. When all looks lost, one child's faith in the Easter bunny is what ends up saving them all. And the fact that today kids are still choosing to believe in things like Santa (probably the easiest one), the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, the Sandman, and even Jack Frost, I'm sure, after this movie, really warms my heart. Even if these versions are more built to be fighters than the classic representations.

Sweet movie that was hugely entertaining. Highly recommend.

8 outa 10.

Potiche: Who Thought Feminism Could Be So Adorable?

Chaque fois que je regarde un filme francais, je veux depenser la reste du jour en parlant francais. Mais. Bon. Excusez-moi. Tout la reste serais en anglais.*

Vive la France.

So I went to the gym today for the first time in about a month, and you know what that means. Yes, yes, more movies for me to feast my eyes upon so I can endure a half hour on the elliptical, yay!

Today's unexpected gem was a French film called Potiche (roughly translates to "Trophy Wife"). Probably the most adorable movie about politics that I have ever seen. Taking place in 1977, a French housewife named Madame Pujol (Poo-jole, guys) is called upon to take over her husband's umbrella factory.  Her husband, quite unwell following his kidnapping by members of the umbrella factory union, lays dormant for three months while she manages the factory's inner workings. Usually spending her time taking care of a household and writing poems, Madame Pujol is unused to the business world, but takes to it easily. The efficiency with which she manages the umbrella factory in her husband's absence causes the greedy guy to take extreme measures to win it back for himself. What she does as a result is pretty cool.

Also, jeez, look how amazing Catherine Deneuve still looks???

This was a great film for feminism. It adresses the fact that men and women are different, but that sometimes this can be a good thing. Madame Pujol loves beauty and has a definite sense of humanity, two things that her husband definitely lacks. She also helps the factory run smoothly as a result of her respect for everyone, and by finding a job that suits everyone's personalities. Even though she begins the movie as a sort of absent-minded housewife, she ends if as a powerful contender for the political community. Pretty cool for the 70's. Additionally, hints to her indiscretions as a younger housewife remind the audience that sometimes women and men are very much alike, if not always viewed by society in the same light. While her husband traipses around town with different girls on his arm and even has an affair with his secretary, Mme Pujol is so discreet about her own that her husband literally does not believe her.

Who's infidele now, bitch?

I also love the nostalgic spin on the filming style. Dual shots fill the screen as we see her jogging towards the camera in one shot above another side shot of her feet running. The beginning of the film also is very bright and very opulent, calling to mind the movies of the 60's, while the latter half brings attention to the workers and to the reality of what things are. The music is cute, too.

Also these two dance on a lit-up disco floor. Frealz.

All around good fun and important message. Love Catherine Deneuve as Madame Pujol and Gerard Depardieu as Babin, the leader of the umbrella union. I so rarely find French films that aren't heartbreakingly sad or extremely dramatic, but I LOVED how cute and meaningful Potiche ended up being. See it now, kthanks.

*Every time I watch a French movie, I want to spend the rest of the day speaking French. But. Ok. Sorry. The rest will be in English.

Silent Hill 2: The Hill Just Got More Silenter

Huh. Interesting. Maybe it's because I only saw the first installment of this movie last week and hadn't quite processed its themes yet, but this movie didn't make any sense. "Only once you destroy (and by destroy we mean join with) Alessa can Silent Hill be destroyed! Except it won't actually be destroyed! Mostly! Except for the one part of it! Because at the end a character decides to stay there! So what was the purpose of you coming here? We don't know! ....Look! A scary spider made of mannequins!"

"Rawr!"

So the film starts out with Alessa/Sharon/Heather being about 18 or something. Why the name change you ask? You find out about twenty minutes in. So (for those of you that have seen the original movie) the way they explain Sharon coming back without the mom is that the mom found a key into our dimension but that there was only room for one person to go through because half of the key was missing.

Observe: The key.

And Heather (aka Sharon) starts having these crazy dreams about all this stuff that's still going on in Silent Hill. She starts to hallucinate things going on around her reminiscent of the Silent Hill dimension, complete with Triangle-Hat Executioner Man and Saw-blade Arms Lady. So what does she do? She goes back to Silent hill of course! Where nothing but nonsensical weirdness ensues.

Also somewhere in Silent Hill they found a carnival.

So the problem with this movie is that it seems like someone was making it up as they went. "I think that Sharon should be back in our world and with the dad."
"How?"
"Uhh...well she's with her mom right? Her mom helps her get out?"
"How?"
"Uhhh, maybe there's like a hole in the dimension?"
"How would they reach this hole?"
"With a key...?"

The rest of the movie tries to carry a reason for everything, but each reason just seems like it's totally contrived. The whole plot doesn't really hold water and while the monsters are as interesting as ever, I was spending so much time trying evaluate what the heck was going on, the disturbing images kind of passed me by while I was asking Nick things like "Wait..why is that thing killing her? Who are all these people? Wait...what? I thought they all died in the first one?"

Even Sharon/Heather/Alessa/Margaret/Catherine/Thelma is confused.

Unfortunately, peeps, you'd be just as lost watching it if you had never even seen the first one. I would wait for this one to come out on Redbox or OnDemand.

2 outa 10.

PS It really bothers me when sequels have look-alike actors for children from their originals. Obviously they can't have the original kids but can't they just ex out the kids altogether?

Shopgirl: Rom-Dram?

When I first saw Shopgirl on the shelf at Blockbuster a few years ago (wow I'm old), I thought it would be a hilarious romantic comedy with my favorite Steve Martin character, Jason Schartzman as the awkward goofy guy, and Claire Daines as a cool love interest.

Then I read the book last month. Little did I know that I had the complete layout a little skewed.

Shopgirl isn't really a funny movie. It's actually sad for a good portion of the novella and Steve Martin, you can tell, took pains to see that the movie closely followed his original work.

Observe, the original work.

Claire Daines plays Mirabelle, a shopgirl working at a glove counter in the couture department of Saks Fifth Avenue in LA. Yes, glove counter. And no, Mirabelle hardly ever sells any. Her life is dominated by tedium and her shy demeanor doesn't really give her much wiggle room in terms of making new friends.

Boring.

While things look up for a brief time when she goes out with a man named Jeremy (Schwartzman), Mirabelle's future looks a little bleak. But Mirabelle's life gets turned on its side after she receives gloves from a stranger named Ray Porter (Martin) and the rest of the movie follows a map of human complexities and romantic interpretations.

Love stinks. Yeah yeah.

The movie is actually very beautiful. While seeing Steve Martin as this new complex character is a little throwing at first, he carries the role gracefully. The chemistry between Mirabelle and Ray Porter is a little stiff, but not unbelievable when compared to their characters, and their comfortability at some points in this film is almost heartbreaking when compared with their labeling of their relationship. The fragility of Mirabelle's poor little self is also a little sad. This is a sad love story for the majority of its duration. Mirabelle and Ray are both hopelessly flawed without any real idea of how to fix each other and without any real depth of understanding as to the other's entire personality.

Ah, l'amour.

But fear not, dear friends, because this movie ends on a high note (I won't ruin how). A very moody, poetic film typical almost of French cinema, Shopgirl keeps you pensive, breaks your heart, and renews your hope in love all in one sitting. Good job, Steve.

Six and a half stars.

The Rebound: Not as Dumb of a Romcom as One Would Expect

When Netflix recommended to me the film The Rebound the other day, my first thought was "oh goody! A mindless romcom!" But the movie ended up surprising me more than just a little. In the same vein as a movie like Something's Gotta Give, The Rebound starts off making fun of itself, but then takes a serious turn.

Housewife Sandy (Catherine Zeta-Jones) is a perfect suburban mom. She makes pies, drives her kids to school, and makes sure that there is always hand sanitizer around. But when she discovers her husband is cheating on her, she hightails it out of the suburbs and heads for the city.

Apparently, this happens a lot there.

Living over a coffee shop with her two kids, they befriend one of the baristas and he ends up nannying for them. But as Sandy gets more and more frustrated with dating and closer and closer to Aram (Justin Bartha), they both start to wonder where their relationship will take them. The only problem? She's forty and he's twenty five.

Not that you can tell...Jeez...someone give me this lady's genes...

The movie takes its time with putting them together, even though the whole title suggests that (duh) they're going to get together at some point. Sandy goes out on horrible dates and Aram can't seem to connect with the ditzy girls that are his own age (offended.), so they end up hanging out with each other half the time. When they finally get together you'll be screaming "YAY!" (hopefully in your head and not actually that loud). Zeta-Jones and Bartha do a great job of being real (surprisingly for such a low-profile movie) and the kids are hilarious.

S'damn cute!

What seems to trip their characters up is the opinions of their friends and the hardships of dealing with societal agism, which is interesting in itself. Not that anyone hasn't even heard of a couple being significantly far apart in age. I'm sure everyone knows at least one couple that's a little far apart. But in recent years,  cougars seem to be becoming a cool thing. And surprisingly, people seem to be okay with that (seriously, look at Hot in Cleveland, Cougartown, and even Desperate Housewives). In fact, older women seem to have a higher capacity for serious relationships than girls my own age (well, at least on film). And in this film, Sandy and Aram provide a commentary that suggests that age old saying that "Age is just a number".

Seven out of ten stars. Also the ending is adorable.

Sorry the quality of the trailer isn't 100%, my bad yo.